LEADER’S GUIDE

– The Sex Series –
GOD’S DESIGN  .  DANGER  .  REDEMPTION  .  HEALING

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Student Notes

The BIG IDEA

God gives sex for a married man and woman to enjoy, to multiply the human race, and to point to God’s love for us.

The PROBLEM
We don’t understand that sex is God’s gift to us, so we experience brokenness from using it in harmful ways.

Our RESPONSE
Understand God’s design for sex and trust his power to experience it as he designed.

Why THIS MATTERS
Most people think sex is amazing, but not many people stop to think that God created it. Sex is worth reserving for its intended purpose so that we don’t experience the pain that comes from stepping outside his design.

I WANT MY STUDENTS TO:

• KNOW: Sex is a gift that God wants to give us in the right setting.
• EXPERIENCE: Gratitude to God for the gift of sex and hopefulness about experiencing it as he intends.
• DO: Trust in God’s power to experience sex in a way that lines up with his will.

The idea box is a place where you can find some creative ideas for leading this study. You might find videos, activities, or great illustrations that really bring the main point home. The ideas come from small group leaders like you, so if you have an idea that isn’t in there, click below to share it with the community!

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WHAT DO YOU THINK?

*Picture this scene: You’re relaxing in your home on a comfortable couch with a fire burning brightly in the fireplace on a cold, winter night. Now picture this scene: You’re standing in the street in front of your home as a fire burns brightly throughout your home on a cold, winter night and destroys it. There’s a fire in both scenes, but what’s the difference between the two scenes?

Allow the group to discuss. Help your group see that in one scene the fire brings satisfaction because it’s in a fireplace, under control, and used for its designed purpose. In the other scene the fire brings destruction because it’s out of control and not used for its designed purpose.

WHAT DOES GOD SAY ABOUT THIS?

*1. Just as a fire is amazing in the right setting, sex is amazing when we experience it as God designed it. Read Genesis 2:18-25. What did God say wasn’t good after he created the first man (verse 18)?
It wasn’t good for the man to be alone.

*2. What did God do about this based on verse 18?
He made a woman for the man to be a suitable helper for him. She was his equal but was distinctly different. See also Genesis 1:27.

*3. Verses 24-25 explain God’s plan for marriage and the sexuality that’s part of that relationship. What do the phrases “hold fast (joined) to his wife,” “become one flesh,” and “naked and not ashamed” (verses 24-25) suggest about God’s plan for sex?
Allow the group to discuss. These phrases suggest that God designed sex to happen in a life-long marriage commitment between a man and a woman and to grow great intimacy between them. Science confirms this: the hormone oxytocin creates a pleasurable bond for those who have sex in marriage, but this hormone heightens our disappointment when we experience sex outside of God’s design. See this article for more info: https://bryanasands.wordpress.com/2013/06/23/sex-and-glue-the-emotional-bond-of-a-physical-act/.

*4. Read Genesis 1:27-28. What do these verses suggest about God’s design for sex?
They suggest that God designed sex in marriage to reproduce people to rule God’s creation and multiply his image, so everyone can see who God is and what he’s like.

5. Read Proverbs 5:18-19. What do these verses say about God’s purpose for sex in marriage?
God wants sex in marriage to bring pleasure and satisfaction.

HOW DO WE APPLY THIS TO OUR LIVES?

6. Summarize what you’ve learned about God’s design for sex from these passages.
God designed sex to happen as part of a lifelong marriage commitment between a husband and wife. He designed sex to grow intimacy in marriage, reproduce people to show who God is and what he’s like, and give satisfaction and pleasure to the husband and wife.

*7. What are some of the ways that you or people you know have struggled because of making sexual choices outside of God’s design?
Allow the group to discuss. Possibilities may include pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, guilt, shame, harder breakups, divorce, and having to drop out of school.

8. How does it help to understand God’s design for sex as you make choices that have to do with relationships and sex?
Allow the group to discuss. Understanding God’s design for sex serves as a powerful guide to experiencing the blessings of sex instead of having sex become a source of brokenness in our lives.

*9. Think back to what we talked about with the two scenes and the fire. How does this apply to the way we experience sex?
Allow the group to discuss. Experiencing sex in God’s design makes it beautiful and satisfying. Experiencing sex outside of God’s design brings pain and destruction.

*10. What choices or decisions do you need to make in order to see your life line up with God’s design for sex? Remember that God’s Spirit will give you the power to follow through on obeying whatever is his will for you.
Allow the group to discuss.

Our review cards are an excellent way to review your past lessons with your students before each study. Not every lesson has one yet but if we have them, you can find them on the PRINT page. Check them out and use them each week to help your students grab hold of the truths in these studies.

What ideas do you have that could improve this study? Are there creative things you do to bring this topic home to your students? Please share with the community clicking the FEEDBACK button or leaving a comment below.